A train that leads to heaven


Rajiv Chowk metro station is the worst place on earth one can be in the morning, in the evening, round the clock till the goddamn thing shuts down. Once I saw a German couple waiting in the queue for the Metro towards Gurgaon and if you live here you will know what actually happens as soon as the Metro arrives. A typical Indian in the queue would say “Do hell with your queue I am getting in first cause I am convinced that if I stand for 20 minutes I am going to die, moreover why stand when I can just push a few old men and get in first to lay my as off”. Well, whatever, as soon as the train entered, the queue dissolved like a fart in air; they were all over the stinking place. They were like these tiny, agitated particles that were committed to prove the law of ever-increasing entropy of the universe. The process was over when all of them were done with their commitments and only the Germans were left standing there as the doors closed. When the train left they started laughing at whatever, I will never know. We did a great job, didn’t we?

I am not really a metro guy and the statement holds true in two ways. One, I don’t come from a big city and two I don’t really use Delhi Metro that often. Out of compulsion, I have to sometimes and it’s a kind of funny system. By law, first two compartments are reserved for Women and if you see the Women coach a bit hairy, you know there is no space for you on that god forsaken train cause there will be twice as men on it per coach. I will not say that I don’t like women in the general coaches, I do but there will always be men who would like it more than you. So much that they will be drawn to them without knowing what they are doing or saying. The government has to stop such events, hence reserved coach.

I lost all my hopes with this one event. I just got this new pair of eyeglasses, nothing fancy but just out of the shopping window. The usual happened at Rajiv Chowk while I was trying to get on the train. I felt as if I was in a whirlpool but with only people replaced water here. Someone really did punch me on the face and I could see my spectacles flying in the air in slow motion, just like you would see in a movie. My glasses fell down followed by a thousand foot stamps on it. There was no point of looking for them anymore and I could only yell “Yes, this is the train that goes to heaven. Get on anyhow or you will miss”.

By Rohit Singh

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